Last night, still wet from taking a shower, I put on the most hideous tank top and underwear combination known to man, then some even scarier socks/slippers. I was in the kitchen chopping cabbage and listening to ‘Wrecking Ball’ on repeat, headphones in. (Stop judging me!) I was getting into. it. We’re taking loud-singing-hip-grinding-I’m-in-a-very-bad-music-video action. I had this song on repeat FOREVER. I noticed that my kitchen blinds were sort of open, but I didn’t think that really mattered. Then I received a phone call from this guy that I have the hardest crush on, and I heard him not only in my ear, but also on my balcony. He saw (and heard!) the whole thing. I was missing his texts because I was too busy “performing” unwittingly for him as he stood outside of my kitchen window. This is my life.